Vanessa Leite
To the one that marks the spot

I always thought about how people have so many different needs and how it is heavy to wish to have them all from the same person.
I thought myself a complicated and complex being with many different desires and contradicting wishes...
I wish for love, daily and simple, the good morning and good night texts, the type that sleeps through a phone call.
And I wish for love, long-lasting and deep, that knows and holds my secrets and helps me to heal.
I wish for laughter and being ridiculous.
I wish for my own time and reflections.
I wish for intelligent conversations and learning new things.
I wish to make love, intense and rough, and I wish to fuck, kindly and caring.
I wish to feel, to share my emotions and how they arise.
I wish not to have to wait when the feelings are already there.
I wish to be connected and not feel restrained.
I wish to feel grounded and not be afraid of losing myself.
I wish for random messages throughout the day about things that remind you of me.
I wish to be supported and hyped up and feel that loving me is not a burden.
I wish to be seen as a sexual being and the force that brings you up.
I wish for kisses under the rain, photos, and videos of all the moments.
I wish to be heard and treated like a person before anything else.
I wish to be offered solutions and that sometimes you just get mad about things with me.
I wish to be held, to be hugged, and to be physically connected, at least by a toe, through the night.
I wish to feel my heart pounding and to get a smile on my face by hearing from you.
I wish to be described with passion.
I wish for a loud love filled with coffee in the morning and quiet love filled with cuddles in the evening.
I wish to share random and weird dreams I had.
I wish to plan kinks and fantasies.
I wish to watch crappy movies together but good ones too.
I wish not to be all about poems, flowers, or sentimental things, but I wish to be knocked out by the way you walk.
I have so many wishes, and above all, I wish to offer you everything I wish to have for myself.
How did I think this one person didn't exist when I am sleeping with me every night?
Am I so special to be one of a kind?
It's tempting to think so, but I am starting to doubt it.
I put my head on my pillow and think to myself where's the catch because I am seeing my wishes become true.